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Is This a Bribe?
2006-06-15, 4:05 p.m.

Day 662 Is This a Bribe

If not a bribe, then is it some other from of trying to buy me? Possible that�s it�s also guilt rearing it�s head too.

Thing that�s bugging me is this: Cindy gave me my Fathers Day present last night. First time in a few years that she�s actually gotten me anything for Fathers Day. This was no tie, or new shirt, or even a coupon for greens fees at the local golf course. It�s actually something I�ve been lusting for for quite some time now (no, not THAT, although it would have been greatly appreciated too), but just never bothered to take the plunge and get.

She (and the kids) bought a spankin new Digital Camera, and gifted it to me for Fathers Day. Sexy little thing � the Kodak V530 (really, could she get one from anyone else and hope to live?). 5.1 Megapixel, 3x optical zoom, 3x or 4x digital zoom. Great LCD display on the back and no view finder. Whole thing is about the size of a pack of Marlboro Light 100�s.

I really shouldn�t look a gift horse in the mouth, BUT . . . I can�t help but have a few misgivings about the situation. Well, one mostly. After I was done ooohing and aahhhing and getting the box open and taking the camera out, fondling it and getting it all turned on (yes, the battery was partially charged!!), Cindy mentioned that she wanted to get me something really nice this year. As a way of saying thanks for putting up with all the stuff she�d put me thorough this year. Now, she said this within earshot of the kids, so we were in no position or place to start a debate on the subject.

Pretty much for the rest of the evening I was either fixing dinner, reading the camera manual (yes � a guy reading a manual!!) or installing the S/W. By the time dinner was done and the software was installed and ready to run it was too dark outside to get any decent garden or pond photo�s � so that will wait till tonight.

Am I in danger of doing what I complained about the other day? Am I in danger of over analyzing a situation, trying to find fault with it, when I should just whack it in the head and take off? (Got a further comment on that later too)

What I�m really afraid of is that Cindy is trying to gloss over her meltdown from last month and her inability to restrain herself around anything containing ethanol by buying me a pretty little toy (prescsiousssss), telling me she really does love me still, and thanking me for putting up with all her shit lately.

Sorry, that�s just smells a tad fishy. Personally, I think she�s trying a little retail therapy by proxy, hoping to get me to start feeling a bit better about things in general and her specifically. I may entertain thoughts on the subject, but pretty little baubles (sexy little camera�s too) can�t excuse the past few years of her shenanigans. Actually, only one thing can do that (it ain�t blow jobs), but I�m not sure she�s ready to take that step (those steps?) yet.

Anyhow. The other day I mentioned something about how women like to bitch & moan about something, repeatedly, but never bother to do anything to fix the condition, situation, what ever, and men tend to just go in, club the thing over the head and be done with it. Well, im2evil4u called me on it. Evil�s take is that it�s just a personality trait, based on the individual and not the individuals gender. I gotta concede the point. If I sit back and think on it (ruminate, as it were), I can think of roughly equal numbers of guys & girls that can sit and bitch incessantly on a subject, but never lift a finger to improve things. Also know plenty of women that can be very assertive, proactive, even caveman like when it comes to resolving an issue. (One of them kind of scares me. She�s a QA engineer here and she�s bigger then me. Like 6�2, 280I tangled with her once when I didn�t really know who she was. Didn�t know she was above my boss in the local food chain. Oops.)

Guess that was my official retraction of that poorly thought out statement. Evil 1, me 0.

Just went out and bought a memory card for that camera. 512MB. That�s a lot of pictures.

Also just got off the phone with Cindy. Man, she�s being awful civil to me lately. Still going to hit up my Al-Anon meeting tonight. Maybe this week the person with the key will remember to show up. Last weeks meeting kinda got blown out of the water. Nobody that showed up had a key to the church. We sort of hung around outside for a bit, then a few of them decided to go do the meeting at a local restaurant. I was more worried about getting home and cooking dinner, so I excused myself from the rest of the proceedings. Besides � no treasurer or president in attendance. Guess that isn�t too important for an Al-Anon meeting, but still, with no ring leader it�s kinda hard to have a meeting.

Tonight�s to do list: (after the meeting) pick up dinner on the way home, pond pics, Sports ab crunch motivational tool. Might even try to fit in some work. Horrible, I know.


Updated stats:
Weight start: 206.5 on 1/1/06 (265.0 on 1/15/05)
Current weight 188.5 on 6/12/06 (popped the cork, apparently)
Target: 180 by 7/1/06 (Riiiight)
Next �official� weigh in: 6/17/06

The Keep on Truckin goal: (idea stolen shamelessly from Marn�s Big Adventure)
Miles at speed 6/15/06: 461.84
Miles with cooldown: 507.85
Target for 2006: 1000 miles































Weighdown Stats
VICTIM NET LOSS TARGET WEEKS TO GO % OF GOAL
Brian 5.25 14 2.5 37.5
Sport 5 8 2.5 62.5
alison 4 8 4 50.0




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old habits - new tricks