Origins
2007-04-22, 10:32 p.m.

Day 973 Origins

Alternate title: I Ain�t Dead Yet!!

Today being the 22nd of the month, it is an anniversary of sorts, marking 32 consecutive months of no smoking. It�s been kinda nice, going from not being able to run for more than a couple hundred yards at a whack to getting upset at not being able to run a 7:15/mile pace for a 5K. Yet. Here�s some stats compliments of www.quintet.net

Your Quit Date is: Sunday, August 22, 2004 at 7:00:00 PM
Time Smoke-Free: 972 days, 11 hours, 11 minutes and 45 seconds
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 19449
Lifetime Saved: 4 months, 28 days, 13 hours
Money Saved: $3,969.84

Almost $4K saved - and that�s figuring a pack of smokes at $4.08/pack, which is what I was paying for a bargain basement brand at the time. I�m sure it�s up a buck since then. But I really don�t care.

Only did two cycling classes yesterday, wanted to get out and enjoy the day. Managed to finish the exterior window trim without needing to replace a single shingle. Also got the pond opened up & cleaned up. The filters were in dire need of a good rinse. Water is looking better already. Looks like all our plants survived winter too. I sunk everything to the bottom of the pond in a suspended tray of sorts. Takes two people to manage it, but worked great. Now we have 3 lilies, 2 irises and one other thing who�s name I can�t recall � but they�re all growing and stretching for the light. Now that they�re all on the upper shelf and the water is getting clearer, they�ll do fine. Temp wise, the water was up to 54 Saturday night � warm enough for summer food even. Skipped over that clumsy 40 � 50 degree range when they have to have a hi-carb, low protein diet. Dr. Atkins would be SO upset!

ON the �what have you done to piss off your alcoholic today?� front, I haven�t. Pissed her off that is. After getting totally blotto Friday, she didn�t drink all weekend. Had to have been one extremely hung over puppy Saturday. I got my stuff done, she strayed on the couch, missed a completely gorgeous day here. I may even have gotten a wee bit of sunburn on the back of my neck. Feels good actually.

Today I asked her if she was actually going to try and communicate today, or just grunt all day long again. Everybody is trying to act as normal as possible, hoping that she finally realizes that she�s the one missing out on life by holding on to what ever grudge she�s gnawing on at the moment. Personally, I still feel she�s more upset with herself and embarrassed over what she�s done. I doubt it�ll be enough to trigger any changes. Somehow I get the feeling she�s going to have to sink much deeper before she finally either turns around or turns off. All I can do is detach, keep those around me safe & informed and let nature take it�s course.

She did start to warm up some today � we even survived a trip to the grocery store together. But she hasn�t broached the subject of Wednesday night (the night of the smackdown, as it were), and I am less than thrilled about stepping into the line of fire. Again.

Well, 5am is coming along soon, and I have stationary bike just begging to be ridden in the morning. I best go get my beauty rest. Later folks.

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