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One Step Closer to Normal
2008-09-17, 10:30 p.m.

Day 1486

Well, that’s (mostly) done. The Bob is in his new digs. Has his own bed, their furniture (desk, nightstand, dresser, lamps, occasional table) and a bunch of his favorite pictures/paintings/collages on the walls. Most of the clothes he regularly wears are in place as well.

What’s left is to empty out his apartment. Mostly kitchen items he never used. Pots, pans, place settings, silverware & utensils. The furniture we’re going to toss. Well, what’s left of the furniture. He already trashed a desk & file cabinet, a bamboo/rattan bookshelf, computer hutch, - the list goes on. What he had left was a nice dresser and matching night stand and 3 leather recliners. The recliners survived. Anything with a drawer in it doesn’t work as well as it used to. So? Goners. All of them.

Anyhow. He’s in. We’ll salvage a nice kitchen starter set for some one of the kids apartment. Eric’s getting close to needing one, B-I-L Wayne’s second in line is getting close as well. Someone will get some use out of it. Buncha knick-knacky stuff left too – some of it kinda nice for decorating. Can’t imaging how it survived, but it’s there, waiting for a good home. Might make nice garage sail fodder too.

Got that Al Anon assembly coming up this weekend. Was planning on doing Friday night, all day Saturday and on into Sunday morning. In light of recent events, I may back it down to doing just Saturday. Drive 100 miles in the morning, do the do, drive 100 miles back home that night. (Last year, I had company for the weekend. Rather illicit, but holy crap – If I wasn’t attending an Al Anon function in the main part of the hotel, I was ‘otherwise occupied’). This year? Not an option.

I’m also entertaining thoughts of asking Cindy to come along. Might help get her mind off her dad for a while. Might also prevent her from getting his apartment emptied out and turned over to the management. We’ll see. I plan on burning that bridge tonight. When I FINALLY confess about the Al Anon Assembly tonight.

Thing is – things have been going pretty well lately – even with the added complications of getting The Bob situated. Maybe it’s finally sinking in to Cindy’s mind that she’s not doing this all alone, that she does have help - help that thought IT was doing it all alone last year. Who knows? Why ask why? Except I have to finally face up with a whole bunch of my own internal issues – like owning someone’s reaction to what I say/do, being a professional procrastinator and being an enabler by not calling BS when I see and or smell it. To use a Roxie phrase – those are MY pigs. Those pigs I get to fix. (Later . . .)

Sunday evening I was diddling up an entry while the remnants of Ike blew through our area. Lots of wind, bit of rain. Couple trees in our neighborhood got damaged, nothing serious. Somme folks in the area lost power. Highest figure I heard was 17,000 customers. We lost power 3 separate times for a grand total of 10 minutes. I finally got out of bed and closed a window because I was afraid the wind would blow over my lamp. By that point the rain was long gone and we were just riding out the wind.

Locally, we topped out with a 58mph gust. Got maybe an inch of rain. Hardly noteworthy. I really feel for the millions down south, still without power, many without homes to go to. These hurricanes are rough. I’ll take 3 straight days of intense lake effect snow any time. At least when the 5 or 6 feet of snow melts your house is still there. I can’t imagine being without everything. Boggles the mind.

Reminds me of a Sam Kennison comment. He wondered why we kept sending food to poor, starving African nations like Ethiopia or Somalia. His point? Send them U-Hauls. They live in a freakin desert for crying out loud. Nothing grows there. If you send them food, they’ll stay, waiting for more. So send them U-Hauls and move them to where the food DOES grow.
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Day 1487 My Oh My How the Time Does Fly.

Stopped at The Bob’s apartment to pick up a few things last night. I am stunned & amused by what I found. His apartment keys have been a source of angst for the entire two years he was there. In total, I’ve had 4 sets made for him, off of the masters I kept for myself. The Legacy was tired of supplying him apartment keys.

He’s had a set on a red stretchy wrist bracelet for nearly 6 months now. That’s a record during his tenure. Several months ago, I found the first replacement set we ever got him, buried in what most people would use as their sock drawer. I don’t recall what else Bob had in there, but it wasn’t normal. Anyhow, that set has hung on the key holder in our house since the day I found it, along with my own ‘master’ set. Then there was also the current set. (That’s 3 sets accounted for – that’s important to note).

So last night I was rummaging through the kitchen cupboards. He has a dead corner – where the cabinets in the corner just run back to the wall. Nice place to lose stuff. Way in back, I came across a couple of pewter tumblers (be a nice addition to our own set). In those tumblers? 2 more sets of keys. One on a red bracelet (the second replacement), one on a green bracelet (his original, original set). Also fond the manuals to all 4 electric razors he’s gone through this year, and both irons he insisted he needed. Not sure either one got used.

There’s plenty more oddities. 2,683 nail clippers. Ok, maybe only 10. Magnets we got him for hanging stuff on the fridge, 12 bars of soap (Irish Spring & Safeguard) still boxed up. Over 100 handkerchiefs. Seriously. Seemed like every two or three weeks he insisted he needed more. We resisted, but I think he tagged along on group shopping trips and scored some on his own.

If I ever get like that, my boys have instructions to take me out to my favorite tree stand, tie me in, gag me and leave. February would be best (briefest stay), but May through July might be nice too.

Rugged ride in to work this morning. I swear, it seemed like no matter which direction I rode (north & west to the Y, north & east to work) the wind was in my face. 48 degrees this morning too. Riding by moonlight, cold, into the wind. The only thing that could make it better would be if my nose started producing quarts of snot. Which, unfortunately, it does. That’s a fun problem to solve. At 20 mph, it tends to go where ever the hell it wants. Unfortunately, that’s not always on the road. Thank god for sleeves.

Also survived the announcement of the Al Anon assembly this weekend. It’s my own fault for waiting for ever. It’s also my own fault for being overly concerned with Cindy’s reaction. I already know when the Spring Convention is. It’s local too – only about 4 miles away. Should I wait and tell her the night before? (Kidding, mostly)

I have a nasty thought coursing through all 4 of my brain cells. “I wouldn’t BE in AL Anon if it weren’t for Cindy’s drinking”. While true and often listed on gratitude lists, the vein in which it’s being used in my head is more accusatory, not thankful. Bad motives.

Highlights for the week? Bowling tomorrow night. Woo hoo!! Golf tournament for work Friday afternoon. Weather looks to be beautiful. Then it’s off to Syracuse for the Assembly. Back home Sunday and time to totally empty The Bob’s former swinging bachelor pad and see about getting him finally situated in his version of club med.

Time to start the weekend. Might drop in a quickie sometime in there – especially if something noteworthy pops up. Like I become the first 3 time winner of the long drive contest. Or we win a bunch of skins. Or I bowl exceptionally well. Ya just never know.


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old habits - new tricks