Paint the shed?
2006-07-24, 3:47 p.m.

Day 701 What Shed?

So I had plans on maybe painting my tool shed this weekend. We�d been in a lovely stretch of hot (really hot for us) sunny weather. Of course, once you make plans to take advantage of that lovely hot weather, what happens? Naturally, Saturday was a nice, quiet, gray drizzly day. Not so good for running extension cords across the wet lawn to power sanders and the like. Of course, with the sanding not done, the painting isn�t happening. Enter Plan B.

Plan B? Come on, where are ya? Yeah, not so much. Of course, got the usual Saturday morning sweatfest in. Made a little side trip to the store. Needed a few things to properly prepare the pork butt we�d planned on smoking Sunday. That about sums up Saturday.

Cindy was stupendously hung over, whether she�ll ever admit it or not. Not my problem. At least those are the words that are supposed to be coming from my mouth. Friday night was a doozy. Thought we were on the verge of another breakdown, or maybe a break through.

I had this whole long, hour by hour account of the weekend done. It was lousy enough living it once. Wasn�t fun to write, would be less fun to read (I know, I proofed it). Suffice it to say that little paragraph or so I was going to tell Cindy about her drinking and my reaction? You know � I can�t tolerate her drinking, I�ll be steering clear of her when she�s drunk, no help from me yada, yada, yada?

Pam is the one who advised me to wait till she was sober before dropping that one on her. I believe that is sound advice. So sound, I�m still waiting for that sober evening to have that little talk. More than a week later.

She�s got to have a sober moment again soon, right? Well, Saturday was close, but she was so hung over she never got off the couch. All day.

Sunday we had her dad over for the afternoon. THAT didn�t stop her. He was at our house so we could review the estate planning work we had done for him. Shit, Bob�s got Alzheimers and can�t remember much, but Cindy kept trying to make the same freakin points, for ever. Bob and I would agree on something and move on, she�d circle back 10 minutes later and want to go over it again. We ended up doing everything 3 flippin� times, and she still couldn�t keep things straight.

I gave up and took Bob back to his place at the Legacy after dinner Sunday. (Yum, pulled pork, roast corn, grilled asparagus, pasta salad) We went over things once while we were there. I had him write a few things down (useless, as he will forget where he put the paper, or if he finds it, won�t remember what it�s for and will toss it), just to make him feel better. His estate plan is rather straight forward. His wishes are simple, divide everything in half. Property, capital, cash, everything. Cremation, spread the ashes right where we spread his wife�s ashes. Easy peasy. Worst part? I get to be Power of Attorney, Health Care Proxy (for an Alzheimer�s victim!) and Executor of his will. Know what�s left to me? Nothing. Should Cindy pre-decease he and I, half of his estate goes to our kids. (After this past week, that�s the only thing keeping her vertical {I�m kidding, mostly})

Ah well. Maybe tonight I can get in that talk. If she isn�t already looped when I get home. When she gets all pissed at me for calling her an alcoholic and wants her alone time, I can head downstairs and get in some weight lifting. At least then, I�ll have gotten in my last sets of work on the old universal before Cindy tries to boot me out because she can�t stand herself again. Hope the kids will be home tonight. I won�t ask them to be present when I have my talk with Cindy, but it�ll be nice knowing they�ll be there for back up & moral support.

Of course, all things considered, I should drop the bomb (it�s not THAT bad, is it?) tonight regardless. I�ve waited long enough. If need be, I can repeat it later, again and again. Probably will anyhow. But I think the initial thrust needs to be made � provided she isn�t in such a haze nothing will penetrate it. I just want her to start to understand why the kids and I are reacting the way we have been lately. Get drunk � get used to being alone. If the phone rings and I see it�s someone that probably wants you, I WILL answer it and give it to you. No hiding allowed. You want to drive somewhere? Gee, no, I haven�t seen your keys. Deal with the condition you put yourself in.

No help, no harm, no hindrance � my new motto.

Updated stats:
Weight start: 206.5 on 1/1/06 (265.0 on 1/15/05)
Current weight 185.75 on 7/22/06
Next weigh in: 7/29/06

New target � 8/22/06 to be at 180 (my 2 year quit anniversary)

The Keep on Truckin goal: (idea stolen shamelessly from Marn�s Big Adventure)
Miles at speed 7/20/06: 563.71
Miles with cooldown: 619.93
Target for 2006: 1000 miles
Plus 45+ miles biking so far.

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