Will I Ever Retire?
2007-06-05, 5:05 p.m.

Day 1017

Had a lovely chat with some financial planners last night. Bottom line right now is that if I keep working till I�m 62 in the same job, I�ll be able to afford to live �in a manner to which I am accustomed� until I�m like 82. At that point, everything will be tapped out, except for social security � provided it still exists then. Considering that there is precisely 1 male on my Dad�s side that has exceeded 70 years of age (he�s 74 now) and most other males cashed in their chips well before 65, planning to 82 years old seems excessive. Dad? 58. Gramps? 59. Uncle Mick? 65. Uncle Pete? 62. Uncle Bill (likely the next to go) early 60�s. There�s an aunt in there that passed away recently, but I can�t recall the particulars. Lest you think I don�t care much for my Dad�s clan (and I don�t, much) Dad was #2 of 15 kids. It�s impossible to know all my relatives on that side. I know some and pal around with a few. That�s enough. Most of them are nut cases. If I stay away from them, they don�t get on my nerves. It�s better that way.

Of course, all this cheery retirement news is providing I turn my cashed out pension and my 401K from my former employer over to these financial wizards so they can make me truckloads of money.

I have one serious consideration to make still. What to do about survivor benefits. What to do, what to do?? The problem stems from one particular recent (like last night) event. Two weeks ago I told Cindy I was making an appointment with these people so WE could go talk to them and see what could be done about my pension. She is still technically listed as my primary surviving beneficiary. I figured she might want some input into the decision. I reminded her about the meeting late last week and sent her an email about it yesterday morning.

3:30 yesterday afternoon I get a phone call asking what the deal is with this meeting. Why do I ask her NOW if she wants to go? Why didn�t I tell her about it 2 weeks ago? I apparently never told her she HAD to attend. All bull pucky, of course. Now, it is the end of the school year. Cindy has a metric ton of stuff to do � awards ceremonies, graduation prep, on top of all her normal work, so I can understand her reluctance to want to go to a boring financial planning meeting at 5pm. Her office is quiet then, she could get a lot done.

I backed off, figuring there was no reason she HAD to be there. I could gather information and feed her the distilled version of things. Though maybe I�d won a few points for not pressing the matter like some deranged asshole.

Long story short, she ended up going straight home from work, on time. Got home and dove into the bottle. Skipped a meeting to learn how we�re supposed to be financing our retirement so she could get tanked. She also managed to make quite the fool of herself during dinner. It was really nice to watch.

Glad we have the pond. I could go out, feed the fish, watch them scurry around (with all 4 Orfe�s still!!) and cool off some. Cooling down helps to put things in perspective. Here I am, worrying about planning for retirement (I know, I�m so young still!! Hah!), getting pissed at my drunken spouse when there�s people with more immediate, pressing concerns, like what in that empty cupboard can be used for dinner, or what am I going to do for a job or any of a million other real things. I�m fretting some hypothetical event, 12 � 17 years into the future (gah, can it be THAT close?), while I can apparently afford to let my wife drink her liver into submission, when a lot of folks are fretting some real event 12 � 17 days, hours or even minutes away.

I need to quit whining and go do something that will count, something to improve the world. Anonymously.

Managed to drag my butt to the gym this morning. Instead of doing the same old boogie till you puke on the treadmill set at some low slope, I opted for the �Alpine� course. That simulates running over 2 �hills� by cranking up the incline on the treadmill. It also mercifully decreases the speed some as the incline increases. The time/distance numbers look pretty sad, but a good portion of it WAS uphill. Don�t know if it�s going to help or not, but I thought I�d try it for June on the non-spinning days. After that, we�ll see how much better the flat race times are.

Now for some completely random bits:

Gretchen � bummer about the rabbits. We�ve had ducks make similar poor choices about nesting locations. It�s hard to leave them alone, knowing what�s going to happen. But � nature � she can be a real bitch sometimes.

Lila � Thanks for popping in and saying hi. Welcome to the story. Hope the plot gets better sooner rather than later. (Boy do I wish for that!)

Roxie � Thanks loads!! You really, really didn�t have to. You should have seen (or will soon see) a separate, official thank you via the ADA site.

You can bet your bippie (does that date me?) there will be pictures of the event posted next week. Have to show everyone my trusty steed, the sunburn I�ll no doubt get, my fantastically chiseled (sun burnt) legs, and the exhausted look on my (sun burnt) face. Maybe even a few shots of the crowd before, during & after the ride. It�ll be a gas. How much leg do y�all want showing? Enough to see the tan lines?

Gotta go do dinner. Tonight is Chupe de Pollo con Chipotle. For those of us challenged in the Spanish it amounts to Chicken Chowder with Chipotle. Very yummy. If anyone is interested, I can post the recipe � compliments of C00king Light. Easy to make, especially on a week night.

Gotta run.

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