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You call that a vacation?
2005-04-26, 1:39 p.m.

Day 247 You call that a vacation?

Well, weíre back in lovely upstate NY. At least it hasnít snowed here. Weather down in Ft. Myers was gorgeous, of course. 80 degrees & sunny almost every day. Some afternoons clouded up a bit, but it offered a nice respite from the sun and allowed us to stay outdoors. Hit up the beach one day, did the Flea market, got in the minimal amount of shopping required. Flights both ways were uneventful, always a good thing. Did get to see a thunderstorm from above coming into Atlanta Friday morning. Quite the cool sight. Fantastic seeing whole clouds light up as the electrical charge reaches itís discharge potential. Just glad all the lightning was headed down and not towards our jet.

The wifís dad is doing kinda ok, but no better. Left in his day to day routine, he functions. But donít upset his apple cart. He gets off kilter really easily. There are soooo many little things that happened, all memory or thought process related, there is no doubt some sort of dementia is creeping in. Itís a sad process to witness, and even worse when itís happening 1300 miles away. There are relatives down there, but are all in-laws to Cís dad. Super people, but he isnít their responsibility. There are also many friends from up north that have migrated down that way, but again, heís not their responsibility. All that falls to the wif and her brother really (and spouses), and weíre all up here in NY.

Another scary thing is that my FIL is also now the executor of his auntís estate. She passed away back in March. He tried to get the executor duties passed to one of his cousins last year, but nothing ever got finalized. So now we have a person in the early stages of Alzheimerís in Ft. Myers trying to function as an executor of an estate in San Diego (moderately big estate too), with all his direct relatives living in NY. Sweet situation.

On matters closer to home Ė looks like son #1 is closing in on living arrangements for his senior year of college over in Syracuse. Somehow, it involves his girlfriend transferring to a community college in Syracuse, and them sharing an apartment. Really need to talk with Jís parents and see how well all this is sitting with them. They really like Z, and fully expect the 2 of them to get married in the future. But I wonder how well it sits with them that their daughter is cohabitating prior to marriage.

Son #2 has also finalized his living arrangements for his junior year in Fredonia. Still in the dorms, still in a suite, but several new room mates. No real drama with this one. Has a favorite girl, but they havenít formalized any boyfriend/girlfriend arrangements. Think theyíre both a little leery of summers and eventually finishing college. What if they head off in different directions? Theyíre both afraid of investing too much emotionally when their futures are uncertain.

Wif # 1 apparently hasnít changed much either. (Not that I have a wif #2 to change over to, I was just sticking with a theme) Asked if we could stop & get a bottle of hooch on the way home from the airport. Of course, I did. Made her go in though. (Whoop de doo, Iím sure). This was at Noon, last Friday (4/23). That pretty much ended the day right there.

We did have a bit of a missing luggage problem on our return. Seems the only bag we checked through kinda got stuck in Atlanta. It eventually made it home that evening, but it was funny & sad listening to the wif try and talk to the Delta customer service folks over the phone about how to locate out baggage. She couldnít talk clearly, apparently couldnít see clearly either as she kept misreading the file number for our baggage claim. Poor Delta people had to be going nuts. I managed to locate Deltaís baggage location service on the web and was able to keep tabs that way. By 5pm I knew they had gotten out baggage to our home airport and were expecting their delivery truck in our driveway by 10pm. They made it with almost 3 hours to spare. Wif never believed a word I said. Till our suitcase showed up. Then she felt free to pass out. Must have been tired from all the strain of helping.

Saturday was kind of a lost day. Changed the oil in the vehicles and went to Syracuse to pick up a couch & odds and ends from Z Ė starting the move of some non-essential items home from school. Got in a nice workout in the morning too. Ran my fastest 5k to date, but felt all weak and flabby on the weight machines. Had to back down on the resistance on many of them. Amazing what 10 days off can do.

Sunday the full effects of 10 days with no workouts were kicking in. Barely made 2 miles running (like 3.2k). Weight machines were no better than Saturday. Got some ground to make up now. Got a bunch of household chores done in the morning, so didnít actually get to the gym till 3pm or so. That must have been the wifís signal to break out the hooch, because by the time I got home she was lit like a Roman Candle. She did manage to make some meatballs before things got really bad, but by the time I got home, she could barely walk (though sheíd never admit it) Also sure she skipped lunch, which she seems to do to enhance the buzz of the booze. Oh Ė sheís also convinced herself that sheís saving calories like that too. I guess.

C did behave pretty well in Fla. Only managed to suck down 2 bottles of wine in the 9 days we were down there. Maybe 4 beers total, but those were while out to dinner, and I was having beer too Ė I didnít see that as any kind of abuse on her part. (Of course, I think total abstention is the prescription from AA, but I was in a generous, slack cutting mood) But like I said, any hopes I had of the trip being a drying out period were short lived. Like, 30 minutes after the trip was over.

So, Sandy & Zuzus Ė Iíve got my meeting schedule, have a meeting picked out. Iíll just tell the wif whatís up & go. I really liked that piece of advice by the way. About not fabricating a reason to get out of the house. Just tell her where Iím going & why. Brilliantly simple. That alone could do more to effect a change than anything else I could do.

This meeting Iím considering starts at 5:30 on a Thursday. Makes it convenient to get there after work, even if the drive is a little longer than I thought initially. The aftershocks may cause me to miss Survivor that evening, but Iím sure I can find a blank VCR tape to put to use.

I think making this first step will be the most difficult. Rather like starting aerobics. Worried you wonít know what to do, wonít know anybody, will screw something up & be embarrassed. Once you finally get there, itís not so scary, thereís other new comers, the old timers are really helpful and make you feel welcome, and thereís really nothing to screw up. Thatís the part I need to get to. Thursday.

247 days down Ė 6 airports not smoked in. Very cool.

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